Mirror Mirror.

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I look in the mirror

Who do I see?

A hideous troll staring back at me.

I was a washed painting

While everyone else was a masterpiece.

With eyebrows for long brush strokes

And valleys of unused skin

Eyes that long for the forgotten stars

Stolen by horrendous scars

I became sick of all the lies, cries, and swollen eyes.

Feeling ashamed and afraid

Caught up with all this chaos I choose to conceal my pain.

How dare they?

How dare they tell me how to feel?

They have the audacity to think it’s okay to point out my flaws.

Comparing me to a malfunctioning machine

This is what needs to be fixed.

This is what needs to change.

. This is what needs to be disposed.

Enough- I am sick of it.

I look in the mirror- and what’s in front of me?

A girl who has given up.

A girl who has been consumed by her demons.

A girl who only believes

She is the monster staring back at me.

But I want to see and appreciate

Those wandering eyes that are too naive to speak of lies.

Hair big enough to be able to enter another galaxy

Excess skin that is there so there is more of her to love

Cheeks that have been squeezed to the point of pain

By every relative to express their infinite amount of love for her

I want to understand that no one is ideal.

I want to believe I am loved for every single flaw I display

with my body, mind, and spirit.

And when mama says “You are beautiful”

I crave to not only believe it but to feel it

Because mama is always right

I want to strangle that monster who consumes my reflection

But how can I murder something that I am told doesn’t exist

Mirror mirror on the wall

Why are you letting me fall

Trapped with this monster who is taking over my mind

Who is driving me to the point of insanity

Mirror mirror off the wall

You do not have the power to make me feel small.

Beauty is not skin deep as a mirror would make it seem

I won’t chase those bottles and bars

I will aim for the stars

My body is a kingdom that won’t crumble because of your words.

I will rise like an empress

Even if this feeling has become relentless

Why don’t you understand?

It’s time for me to see the beauty.

It’s time for me to destroy my perception of ugly.

It’s time for me to feel worthy.


Asna.A

Image Credit: D.W

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